SPEAKER_02 0:00

You're focusing on age instead of maturity.

SPEAKER_00 0:03

By age 30, half of the men have already been married. That's a large number.

Sharif Faizullah 0:08

The pros and cons of getting married early and getting married late.

SPEAKER_02 0:13

You meet a guy. Oh my gosh, what do I do? Rushing into stuff, only four percent of his sperm is healthy and normal. Someone says I'm ready, I'm not ready. Don't buy into that. I kind of disagree. I agree with Sana. Rank up that marriage that MBA divorce proof your future marriage today.

SPEAKER_00 0:34

When it comes to being too young, like it says in the book, I don't think you're too young to think about marriage. Getting married and thinking about marriage are two completely different things. And I think once you hit puberty and you're able to talk about sex and reproduction and those types of things, start having conversations about not marriage specifically, but like surrounding male interactions. Okay, you're going into high school or middle school, there's gonna be guys, there's gonna be flirting, they're gonna be interested, you're gonna be in a situation where you can talk to the opposite gender, and you need to be prepared for that because I feel like in um Muslim households specifically, sometimes we forget that and we don't warn our youth, and then that's when we get into situations that are not great. So I think those preliminary conversations are super, super important because you want to be prepared for every step of the way when it comes to love, life, sex, all of those things. You don't want to be under-prepared. I would much rather everyone be over-educated than under-educated.

SPEAKER_02 1:29

If in our households we're not having these conversations as younger girls, we're then going to be put in a situation where there's a boy that likes us, we don't know what to do because our mums have never told us, or our dads, or family members, we don't know Islamically what our role is in that situation. Do you run? Do you like slap him? Do you jump into his arms? You don't know. So you just end up following your desires and ending up in a very sticky situation that is a lot harder to get out of. So these conversations really need to be happening, and love is something that 99.9% of people have experienced. So knowing how to handle that is something that we all need to know because we're most likely all going to experience it in one form or another. You don't want to be in a position that you've not read this book, you've not prepared, and then you meet a guy and you're like, oh my gosh, what do I do? My friend showed me this book or this podcast. Now I need to read it all, listen to it all within three days because I'm meeting his parents in three days. So you're up all night as if it's like an exam, like you know, quickly reading it all, like listening to it on times four speed, trying to get all that knowledge in. You'd rather take your time, understand it, enjoy it, hopefully, getting through this material before getting to that point.

SPEAKER_00 2:44

Yeah, I think rushing into stuff. Sometimes the girls will be like, okay, this is the first guy that likes me. He's gonna be the only one that likes me. I'm not allowed to talk to boys. So if this one talks to me, I have to marry him. That's not true. Or like, oh my god, like I made a mistake and now I have to marry this one. That I think is number one negative perpetuation that everybody talks about because it's like you can't afford to make mistakes. I would much rather you lose character points than you get into a marriage that isn't right for you, or jump into any sort of relationship that's not right for you. You have to take into account, like, what do I want from life? And that doesn't have to just be for your future husband. You can say, What do I want from everyone in my life? What kind of people do I want to surround myself with? What circle do I want to build? And then that will also take you to better places in your relationship. You know what I mean? Okay, the people around me are good people, they're good role models. Now I can pursue better opportunities with the people around me too.

SPEAKER_02 3:38

This whole concept of like you're going to expire by the time you're 23, so you need to quickly get married. I think that's just the stupidest idea.

SPEAKER_00 3:47

I agree. I don't think that there's like a specific blueprint regarding age for every situation. There's no end-all be all for this is the age you need to be to get married. I think pushing like you have to be engaged and married by 25 for everyone, that's not valid unless you know exactly what that person wants from life. I don't know if you guys have ever watched Friends, that one episode where Rachel's turned 30 and she's like, Oh my god, it turned 30, and I wanted to have my first baby by 28, so I needed to meet my fiance yesterday. And I was like, What are you talking about?

SPEAKER_02 4:20

That's literally what I was like just about to say. That I think that whole concept needs to be rephrased in terms of maturity. I think that's something that really gets on my nerves a little bit that you're focusing on the wrong metric, you're focusing on age instead of maturity.

SPEAKER_00 4:37

I know the first thing everyone's gonna be thinking is like boys mature so much slower than women, women are always more married-minded. So I think for girls, we start thinking about that so much earlier, especially because it's so culturally instilled too that, like, oh, you need to get married, you need to be prepared to be a wife, be a mother, all type of things. But like for men, we don't usually teach them that that early on, and it's not really pushed either that oh, you need to be prepared to be a father or a husband, it's more so you need to be a provider, so it's more like education, job focused. So I think maturity levels definitely need to be taken into account. And I agree, I don't think that there's like a specific blueprint regarding age for every situation.

SPEAKER_02 5:13

Going back to the thing about getting married too young, from my own perspective, getting married young isn't the end of your life. Realistically, in the West, people are getting in relationships at 16, 17, 18, anyway. Marriage is just like the Islamic version of that, and you know, giving you rights and responsibilities in that way, not downplaying marriage that it's just it's the same as dating someone because it's not. That is something that I don't want to be taken out of context.

SPEAKER_00 5:41

People think that marriage is some sort of imprisonment, and people are like, the second you get married, everything is done. There's like this meme. I don't know if you guys are familiar with like Ordu, but it's like ajkebad, mommy band, daddy band, kana band, fina bond, and it's basically like the second you get married, everything's finished. You don't need to talk to your mom anymore, your dad, you don't get to eat, you don't get to drink, you don't get to go outside, you don't want to come inside. It's like, what are we talking about? That's such a negative image to put onto marriage because it's supposed to be such a good thing and like a blessing to you and your community. And I don't like that people perpetuate that because then it just causes people to get way too into their heads about things and turn marriage to something it's completely not. We just want to preface this is not promoting young marriage. If you're too young to get married, you are too young, nobody is getting married to the middle school, please. But if you find that you have a supportive family and you know what you want from life, and you find someone that you do truly have a connection with, and both of your parents are supportive, and you have an environment in which marriage makes sense, then by all means, you know what I mean? It makes sense for you, and that's totally fine. I don't want to tell people either to be like, no, you should drag on and on and on this like halal dating or whatever the case may be forever and ever and ever, because that's also wrong. So you have to judge your situation for what it is.

Sharif Faizullah 6:57

Let's actually dig into this. Someone they say, you know what, I am not ready for marriage, or I am ready for marriage. Do you agree with those statements?

SPEAKER_02 7:06

I think if someone tells you that they're not ready for marriage, believe them 100%. I think if someone tells you they are ready for marriage, I think believe them maybe that's 60, 70 percent.

SPEAKER_03 7:19

Okay, that's pretty specific. Got you. Yeah, okay. So what do you think, Amel?

SPEAKER_00 7:23

I agree with Sana. I think if someone tells you that they're not ready for marriage, it's probably for a reason that we should definitely dive into. Why do you think you're not ready for marriage? Um, and if you are ready for marriage, I think you definitely need to tell someone that you think you're ready for marriage so that they can make sure. Because you might have a completely skewed perception of what you think marriage is and what you're gonna be doing in your role, and you need someone to reality check you really quick.

Sharif Faizullah 7:48

Okay, excellent, excellent. So that's the perspective I had originally, but after many years of doing this, I have changed. Whenever someone tells me I'm ready or I'm not ready, I don't agree with that. I just said that's not the right premise. The question is, how ready are you? Because it's on a spectrum.

SPEAKER_02 8:06

I think just before we go into that, there's one point I kind of disagree with you a little bit in the sense that when it comes to guys, I think we've all heard stories where they're like, Oh, I'm not ready for marriage, I just want just a bit of fun or something like that. So I think if a guy tells you he's not ready for marriage, I think asking him like where on the spectrum he is, like, if he's not ready, he's not ready. I think guys are more black and white in that okay. If he's saying he's not ready, I think you really should just take it and take take your take it.

Sharif Faizullah 8:44

Take it at face value, like as believe as when he said he's not ready.

SPEAKER_00 8:49

I want to ask you, okay, if someone's not a perfect 10 on the scale, are they still ready or should they still get married?

Sharif Faizullah 8:57

They are ready. There's no such thing as perfect 10 out of 10 readiness. I'm telling you, there is no such thing.

SPEAKER_00 9:01

So somebody's somebody says I'm 100% ready, and that's fine.

Sharif Faizullah 9:04

Yeah, it depends on your priorities. It is never about I'm ready or I'm not ready. You get it? Just the fact that you're 1820, you're biologically ready.

SPEAKER_02 9:12

I do have one thing.

Sharif Faizullah 9:14

Oh man, okay.

SPEAKER_02 9:15

Do you not think that when you're talking about readiness, you can divide that into certain sections in the sense that like financial readiness, emotional readiness, materialistic kind of readiness? And this is maybe just my own personal opinion, but if I was talking to someone who said I'm only eight out of ten from the emotional perspective, I'd expect emotional and spiritual to be either a nine or a ten, preferably a ten. And there's different aspects that different people might be expecting different scores.

Sharif Faizullah 9:50

That's the point. Anytime someone says I'm ready, I'm not ready, don't buy into that. On a scale of one to ten, how ready are you? They say, Well, I'm at a two. Okay. Let's go through every single slice of readiness and let's score ourselves. Because sometimes we're in our head so much, we go with like our gut, our emotion, and it clouds our judgment to the point we don't look at the things in an objective fashion, right? I've spoken to enough guys, and I'll tell you why taking it at face value is not the right way to go because they don't know how much they're actually ready. A guy could tell you, I'm not ready because I don't have a six-figure income yet. I don't have my own house and a car. But here he is actually paying all the bills for his parents, taking care of them, actually taking them to the doctor's appointment, and he's kind and gentle with his parents, with his sisters. He has the qualities to care for a woman, for a family. He even has enough income.

SPEAKER_02 10:47

You do see what I mean? You do have to find out why they think that. Because as you rightly said, if he thinks that he needs a six-figure income to be ready for marriage, then he needs a reality check that, like, unless you're marrying the king's daughter, you don't need that. You'll be fine.

Sharif Faizullah 11:03

So, women, they do the same thing. I've spoken to a couple of them, they're like, my siblings, my brothers are little younger. I am the oldest daughter, I am taking care of my parents. If I go get married, who's gonna take care of the parents? But no one told them that just because you get married doesn't mean you move out of your house. When I tell people this is an option, they're like, wait, what? What? That's an actual option, that's a thing. I'm like, yes, I know people who do that. They they never even thought of that idea as a possibility. What we think to be the truth and the reality, they don't match. Do you guys follow me so far? So are you ready in terms of marriage? Yeah, I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_02 11:40

Yeah, I think it's my opinion of you know what I said at the beginning that like if someone says something, then believe them. I think now I agree with Cherie's point of view.

Sharif Faizullah 11:54

Okay. All right, that that was excellent. Some really, really excellent reflection and feedback. Thank you guys. So, can I play the role of a coach perhaps? So I'm gonna ask you guys to give me your feedback. Let's actually dig into this since it is a deep dive. The pros and cons of getting married early and the pros and cons of getting married late. Give me one pro, something positive about early marriage.

SPEAKER_00 12:20

I have a few personal examples too with early marriage, is just being able to build together, being able to grow together. It kind of goes for both, but as like a young person going out into the world and experiencing things, having a partner that's going through the same things, like a built-in sounding board friend, I think it's nice to have a support system that's yours. I think young marriage gives you that opportunity a little bit in a different way than a later marriage would.

Sharif Faizullah 12:47

Good point. A 22-year-old getting married and growing together, figuring out life together, career, education, and all of it together, versus a 30-year-old, maybe figured out most of our life, all of that stuff is done. Now getting married, this is taking into account that they have made the right decision, they've chosen the right person. That's important. Okay, you could still get married early and choose the wrong person. That's not what I'm talking about. If you do it right, if you find the right person who is compatible, mashallah, that attraction, that love, the opportunity for the love to grow and faster is there, then now that couple has five to ten years of advantage over a couple who just got married at 32. Okay, that's that's one. Who will have a stronger foundation to build on? Sana.

SPEAKER_02 13:32

Um, I think it protects you from falling into sins that happen a lot when we hit the age of around like 20s.

Sharif Faizullah 13:42

Yeah. You won't be as tempted by other guys giving you attention and we're like, oh, look at my ring, bro. I'm taken already. Leave me alone, right? It's it's easy to say that. What else? We will get into the negatives as well. So there are pros and cons in both.

SPEAKER_02 13:56

I think it takes off the pressure of I need to get married. I'm still looking for someone that you take that box in your life and you can focus on other things.

Sharif Faizullah 14:05

Yep, absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 14:07

For me, I'm an eldest daughter, and I'm currently in college. So being able to be married and still be able to be with my family and study and do all those things is nice.

SPEAKER_02 14:16

Maybe more from like her father's perspective, they if anything happens to me, there is already someone who will look after her. And I think it gives them like peace of mind in a sense as well that they would know that you're not doing silly things with anyone, that you kind of got your person.

Sharif Faizullah 14:35

When it comes to children, what would be an advantage of that?

SPEAKER_00 14:38

I would much rather be 30 chasing around a toddler than nearing 50 and chasing around a toddler. You really want to think about okay, personally, where's my energy level gonna be at? Where's my career gonna be at? I feel like young married, you have that advantage because you have more energy, you have more longevity, you have more opportunities.

SPEAKER_02 14:56

You've got more time to have more kids if that's what you want as well. Obviously, if you're 30, you're a bit more limited on that. You also have that more of a freedom to decide when you're going to have kids.

SPEAKER_00 15:10

Yeah, your timeline just has like more room in general. Yeah.

Sharif Faizullah 15:15

So the one thing I recommend, newly wedded couple, spend at least a couple of years before having children. It's much more doable with an early marriage. But at 32, that pressure is much more. But at that time, in your 20s, you don't have that pressure as much. What else? What else could be a pro, a positive of early marriage? I'm gonna say it again. This is early marriage done well. Okay, this is not early marriage like we just randomly get married and then see what happens. No, I'm talking about going through all the proper stages and actually finding the right person, making a lifelong commitment.

SPEAKER_00 15:48

In a younger marriage, the first test that you're gonna come across in a married couple, like your first fights, like financial problems. I feel like when you're younger, those things are a little bit less serious because you're young, but you still experience them. So I feel like those first couple issues, when you're younger, you get to strengthen your foundation right away. How do we resolve our conflicts and how do we fit together and mesh and how compatible are we? I would put that as a pro. It sounds negative, but I feel like it's a pro.

Sharif Faizullah 16:18

I would agree. That transition time allows you to also go to the next stage of your life a little bit more smoothly. Let's dive into the cons then. Okay, so if you do not support early marriage or you're like, ooh, I feel icky about it, you're gonna love this next part. Okay, so here we go. What are the cons of early marriage? What are the negatives of early marriage?

SPEAKER_02 16:37

Whatever comes to your mind, go that you can change a lot. Think it's 25 that your frontal lobe develops. So much can change, and if you're married, and then your frontal lobe develops and you realize that, like, oh my gosh, I am not the person I was a few years ago.

Sharif Faizullah 16:55

The chance of you choosing the wrong person is higher because you haven't figured out who you are yet. You're still growing. Marrying someone just based on purely physical attraction, that's much more likely to happen in an early marriage. True.

SPEAKER_02 17:11

Your capacity to deal with conflicts or difficult emotions might not be as high as it would had you had a few more years, so you might not be handling certain situations in the best way because of the lack of your maturity, I guess.

SPEAKER_00 17:29

For younger marriages, the potential for like outside input is stronger. For example, as a young person, I know that social media is a big part of everyone around me's life. So let's say somebody else that gets married at 22 and I'm married at 22 and their life looks completely different than mine. I might bring that up and have those like resentments in my own marriage. Like, how come you have to work all the time, or how come we didn't take this trip or do this thing, or why aren't we in that position? So I think that is a con because like the stability is just different in young marriage than it would be in an older marriage, and that can be a potential for like problems or arguments to come up.

Sharif Faizullah 18:08

You might be less mature overall. It is possible that in certain slices of your life you might be quite mature in one area, but not as mature in other areas, and that's okay. So your overall maturity level might be low, and the guy's maturity level might also not be as high as you would want.

SPEAKER_02 18:25

If you get married young, and obviously on social media, a lot of the married couples are a bit older, maybe towards their 30s, more financially stable. If they're going to fancy holidays, eating in fancy restaurants, you're kind of comparing your marriage to that because you're also married, but you're 22, you're gonna feel like you're a bit behind or feel a certain way maybe towards yourself or towards your partner that why aren't we doing that? Why can't we afford that? But you're forgetting that there's a big age difference and a different financial situation between the two of you.

SPEAKER_00 19:01

In a younger marriage, right out of college, you're gonna be working, right? And depending on your lifestyle, you might need to work more. Both of you might need to be working. I feel like until you're in that situation, you're gonna downplay it. I feel like you have no accurate description of what that situation will be and how you're gonna handle it until you're actually in it. You can assume that, oh, I'm a very patient person, I'm calm, cool, collected, I'll be fine. I know I want to work, I know my husband wants to work. But until you're in a marriage and you actually are experiencing that, it's gonna be different.

Sharif Faizullah 19:32

Going back to the living situation, another con of that is you're actually living with your parents, most likely. If you grew up with the idea, when you think of a married couple, you always envision living in your own place. That's something that will be a con for you, not just keeping up with the Joneses in social media and everywhere else, but just in general, like, man, I'm still living with my parents, but I'm also married. So that dilemma, you want to be able to fully deal with that. Otherwise, that is definitely a negative. Okay. Can we wrap up early marriage and go to late marriage? By late marriage, we're talking about marrying late 20s, early 30s. Um, what comes to your mind when we think about some positives on getting married late?

SPEAKER_02 20:15

You kind of have had a chance to figure out life, figure out yourself, know a bit more about yourself. And so when you're going into this relationship, you aren't trying to do two things at once, trying to know them and know yourself. You're just trying to get to know them.

Sharif Faizullah 20:30

Your expectations, your expectations are clearer in your mind. Yes. What else?

SPEAKER_00 20:37

I think stability as someone who's older, you've already kind of established your career and yourself, your expectations. Just an overall more stable environment, I feel like, as you're an older person. And then another one that we just discussed and Young's as a con is you have that spatial autonomy because you're more stable, you probably have the ability to get your own space. Less interruption, interruption, interruption, that's okay. Or like interference from in parents because now you're older and they see you as an older person that's getting married.

Sharif Faizullah 21:09

You'll be more mature, you'll be mature hopefully in many different slices. Of course, financially, academically, you're already done with your education. Maybe you already have a established or semi-established career. So you have a good idea about life in general that actually helps with a marriage. So this is why some people saw getting married late, like it's not always necessarily a bad thing because if your expectations are clear, you are mature, you are able to choose a right person, then that marriage could also be quite strong and successful. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:42

Another pro socially is I feel like when you're older, more people around you are also in that same situation. They're also married, you have more couple friends, more people to talk to. Um, people are gonna be in the same situations, combating the same issues. Like, okay, we're having kids now. You have like a better, more stable circle. I feel like When you're young and you get married, your circle is limited.

SPEAKER_02 22:03

You'll have more sources of advice and you can go to more people with the questions because more people in the same position as you. And if you do plan on having kids, your kids are more likely to have friends to play with. I know that might not be that important, but it's just a factor maybe some people would consider.

SPEAKER_00 22:21

I don't want to bring in a point as like, oh, asking questions or advice because I don't want everyone to be like, oh, I'm gonna tell you all about my marriage, my problem, my fights. Because I do think that that's something that you shouldn't do. I don't think that you should be like, oh, my husband is like gambling away all of our money and I need help. You're married too. What does your husband do? I don't want to push that. But I think that kids thing, hadn't you have a circle that's in similar positions as you, then you're able to kind of build a community for yourself. I think finding your niche as a couple is easier when you're older than it is when you're younger because there's just more people out there in the same situation.

Sharif Faizullah 22:56

Yeah. When it comes to parents, also, they will look at you as more mature. Just the fact that you are late 20s, early 30s, they would they're not gonna treat you as a teenager or someone who just fresh out of college doesn't know about life. So they will also regard you with a little bit more maturity and respect.

SPEAKER_00 23:14

They're not gonna question your investments or what you're spending money on or what you're doing because they're gonna trust you to be okay, you're an older person, you have a job, you finish school, we trust you.

Sharif Faizullah 23:24

All right then. Let's jump into the other side. And if you are an advocate of early marriage, you're gonna love this part, okay? Whenever I talk to people, sometimes they're all on one or the other camp. And my goal is to like just you know what there's pros and cons. Even if you disagree with something, just knowing that is helpful. You know, you don't have to agree. At the end of this discussion, you don't have to be on one or the other camp. Just know the pros and cons. Okay, I'll share one. If you wait until your late 20s or early 30s or mid-30s or late 30s, the chances of you being in a situation ship, meaning being tangled up romantically or physically with a guy, is much higher. That's how Allah created us. You'll be fighting with that much longer than someone who's getting married younger.

SPEAKER_00 24:09

Depending on how much older you are, your pool of available men kind of shrinks. Depending on your expectations, not as many people might be meeting those expectations. There's a statistic in the book that completely shocked me to my core that was like by age 30, half of the men have already been married. That's a large number. That is a really big 50% is a lot, so your pool has decreased by 50%. So you want to keep that in mind for older marriage. Not everyone is available anymore.

SPEAKER_02 24:42

Physical health in general obviously won't be as good as when you're in your 20s, but honing in on that point a little bit more in terms of like fertility, there is the risk of you being less fertile and having some issues in conceiving.

Sharif Faizullah 25:00

Yeah, yeah. Pressure to have children is much higher. So you necessarily won't have that two years that I recommend to spend. You will actually feel a lot more pressure to have children. I know some men like, oh, they can no. If you're in your 60s and 70s, your sperms are not as healthy as they were when you're younger. So people have this idea, oh, you can be trust me, no, that's not the case.

SPEAKER_02 25:22

In men, like a normal, healthy, I think like mid-20-year-old Martin, only four percent of his sperm is actually classified as healthy and normal um in terms of its morphology. And if you are like a real biology nerd, you can go onto YouTube and search sperm under a microscope, and you can see that some of them will have like two heads, some of them end up going round in circles, and it's just really interesting that it's only 4% in a normal, healthy mid-20s man, it's only 4%. So give that 10, 20, 30 years, that is also gonna go down. And so men's fertility is also a big issue as well as female fertility.

Sharif Faizullah 26:02

And at the same time, how many children you want to have? Uh that'll also be limiting. Let's say you want to have five children. Well, if you get married when you are 38, for example, like how many children can you have? In the later stages, you might be then talking about not being able to conceive and IVF and chances of things like miscarriages and you know, early childbirth and all sorts of physical issues is much higher. Of course, this could happen to a 25-year-old as well. But I'm talking about generally speaking, I hope this point is clear that there is no right or wrong answer. But make sure, inshallah, to follow this system and make sure you choose the right person. So with marriage MBA, that is my plea to you. When you get married, you don't know that, I don't know that, Allah knows that. But if you are ready, inshallah, you'll be able to take advantage of that opportunity.

SPEAKER_02 26:50

There was a point you made which reminded me of the podcast with Diary of the CEO with the divorce lawyer, and there was a bit that he said that a lot of relationships that he sees obviously break down. It's because they're focusing on their career, their kids, predominantly, but they're not watering the plan, they're not focusing, as he says, like they've lost the plot that you obviously got married to build a storyline with your spouse and that person, and then because your focus has shifted, you've stopped focusing on the actual relationship.

Sharif Faizullah 27:22

Yeah. So usually those are the two areas people get engulfed in. Either they get so busy with their career, their marriage suffers, or they get so busy with their children, their marriage suffers. So that's why I said the first couple of years, wait till you have children. So you can actually water that plant. And so you have to constantly nurture and grow. I know we went on so many different rabbit holes. What's your key takeaway? What would you share with our audience?

SPEAKER_02 27:45

Um, from my perspective, I'd say focus more on maturity than age when it comes to marriage.

SPEAKER_00 27:52

My biggest takeaway here is two things. Um, marriage as a process as a whole is you need to be both introspective and goal-oriented. You need to really take a look at who am I? What do I think about these things? What do I want from them? And goal-oriented. If you don't think you're at a certain place that you need to be, what can you do to get to the next part of that? What can you do to be better? Keep growing. And that is gonna carry you on throughout this whole journey, throughout finding someone, building a relationship with that person, having children, what type of parent, what type of wife, what type of person do you want to be, and how can you continuously achieve that while watering all of the areas of your life?

Sharif Faizullah 28:30

Very good. Remember, marriage is the ultimate love test. Don't look at marriage as an event. It is not a singular event as people think of. It's actually a roadmap, a journey that you are on. So start that journey as early as possible. Inshallah, hopefully, with this season of love mistakes, you are already on that journey. And exactly when that happens, just let that go. It is not up to you. Allah is not gonna ask when you got married, but Allah will ask you how were you with your spouse, how kind and loving you were, how much did you fulfill your rights and responsibilities, how were you with your children? Follow these steps, inshaAllah, and when the right guy shows up, you will know. Or when you're ready, you're like, you know what? I'm gonna go find my guy. Either is okay. So don't worry about when you get married. I'm telling you, at the end of the day, let that go. When I get married, just let it go.

SPEAKER_01 29:21

My favorite love story. It's just so beautiful to honor like. Genuinely, I was so moved. This is such a cute little like heartwarming story. She said, Love isn't a part of Islam.

Sharif Faizullah 29:31

I'm telling you, she is not alone.

SPEAKER_02 29:33

That's so heartbreaking. How are we supposed to get married if we never talk to boys?

Sharif Faizullah 29:38

How are we allowing millions of people to be doing these, making these decisions, but with no preparation?

SPEAKER_00 29:44

This chapter is all about setting yourself up for the successes while being single, while being married, in the hereafter.